Why to read this book –The Happiest Kids In The World
To find out why-
· Dutch babies seem so content, and sleep so well?
· Dutch parents let their kids play outside on their own?
· The Dutch trust their children to bike to school?
· Dutch schools not set homework for the under-tens?
· Dutch teenagers not rebel?
· What is the secret of bringing up the happiest kids in the world?
In a recent UNICEF study of child well-being, Dutch children came out on top as the happiest all-round. Rina Mae Acosta and Michele Hutchison, both married to Dutchmen and bringing up their kids in Holland, examine the unique environment that enables the Dutch to turn out such contented, well-adjusted and healthy babies, children and teens.
How Dutch Parenting Works
- Letting children solve issues between themselves without intervening to let them solve their own problems.
- If a child loses something, don’t replace it, let them save money to replace it themselves so they take better care of their things.
- Include children in dinner conversations, talk to them as an equal, so they feel more comfortable speaking to adults.
- Let them play, don’t push them to be something they’re not, let them be kids, and enjoy life.
- Don’t be afraid to take them out in inclement weather, so they can enjoy any type of weather.
Cons of the book
It’s worth getting to know Dutch parenting methods, however not necessarily from this book. I found the narration where the author is constantly comparing US/UK to the Netherlands quite annoying.
I am not from any of these countries but after a while it became so predictable that the US/UK methods are gonna be portrayed as hopeless while Dutch pure perfection.
There was no critical examples of Dutch methods what so ever. That made the book quite one-layered. Seemed to me that even when authors mentioned examples of not necessarily good ideas, they tuned it around in a way that actually sounds beneficial. For example: breakfast consisting of chocolate sprinkles on bread with butter. It’s an unhealthy breakfast. But the authors say that compared to US, where children eat choco-blobs, their Dutch sprinkles are not bad cause teach children to cherish breakfast – the most important metal of the day. I mean… Why don’t they compare choco sprinkles to Asian ultra healthy breakfast or other countries? Why don’t they quote some statistics which breakfasts in the world are the healthiest and which position is the Dutch one? They won’t cause they only show statistics and research when it matches their theory. And that’s cherry picking data.
Another example where authors didn’t use any critical thinking is “crying it out” method practised by Duch parents for generations (mentioned from the book). It’s been proved a long time ago that crying it out is a very dangerous concept that might have really bad consequences for the baby. Might cause emotional trust issues, cause insecurity later in life or even damage the baby’s brain. It can also lead to poor social development and intellectual issues. But this didn’t match the theory that “Duch is always right” so wasn’t mentioned.
Summary
- This book was written by a couple of expat moms, one from US and one from UK, writing about Dutch parenting, and how the children in the Netherlnds tend to be happier, less stressed, healthier, and with lower levels of obesity, rebellion, depressioin, and so do their parents.
- While the authors seem to attribute a lot of these desirable outcomes to culture, and how free range parenting is a norm, how schedules and eating together are sacrosanct, what I wish there had been more of was an emphasis on how their government actually allows those norms to be implemented– the free medical care, the visiting baby nurses, the shorter work weeks, the guaranteed vacation leave, the low levels of inequality, the lack of access to guns, the lack of widespread poverty or violence– those things are legislative as much as they are cultural, and all could be seen as key reasons for those ideal outcomes in measure of happiness.